For that reason, GOP officials and movement conservatives ought to be preparing for worst case scenarios. And a Donald Trump Network is perhaps the worst case possible.
A Trump campaign expecting to lose and then launch an effort of that sort would have every incentive to hoard campaign donations to pay back debt incurred by Trump himself; to be maximally inflammatory, polarizing the electorate while further cultivating a core of true believers; to aggressively blame Fox News, National Review, Glenn Beck, and all other potential competitors in order to alienate them from their audiences; even to sabotage the GOP down ballot, depending on just how cynical the folks running things are. After all, what could be better for business, if you’re a new media conglomerate to the right of Fox News, than a Hillary Clinton presidency supercharged by a Democratic House and Senate?
Nor would the nightmare for the right end on election day. Even after a huge Trump loss, a Trump News Network could help a destructive faction that might have faded in other circumstances to keep driving the Republican Party toward white identity politics, egregious misinformation, ideological incoherence, destructive infighting, and attacks on minority groups, with all of the attendant costs.
Since the Bush Administration, I’ve been warning the right that its media demagogues were doing great harm to the conservative movement, the Republican Party, and the country. A Trump News Network, while a ludicrous and absurd satirist’s gold mine, would do even greater harm, as I’ve tried to capture in this programming guide that doubles as palliative gallows humor in this dark time:
6 am to 9 am –– Abreast World News with the Women of Miss Universe: Awake to perky pageant winners bringing you sports, weather, and everything you need to know about the loser countries that they fled for America.
9 am to 10 am –– Paid programming: Ben Carson’s Non-GMO Brain Health Supplements
10 am to 11 am––Queer Eye for the Alt-Right Guy starring Milo Yiannopolous: Milo and co-host Ann Coulter work to help white nationalists look fabulous.
11 am to 2 pm––Sarah Palin’s Real America: A folksy look at the “silent majority” communities that the MSM, sipping their elite cocktails, doesn’t want to show, with defending-our-shores soldiers and clean coal miners who did built that. (Shot on location in Los Angeles and Vancouver.)
2 pm––Paid programming: An array of Donald Trump products presented at huge discounts by Little Marco Rubio.
3:00 pm to 4:00 pm–– To Catch an Illegal: Sheriff Joe Arpaio and his most ruthless team of undercover racial-profilers post wanted ads for day-laborers in communities just like yours. Little do the applicants know that their papers, if they have any, will be vetted by the same team of forensic analysts that debunked Barack Obama’s birth certificate.
4:00 pm to 5 pm–– The Enemy at Home: An evening roundtable where a rotating group of national security experts vetted by Breitbart.com expose the sharia takeover of America on Crooked Hillary’s watch. Tonight’s guests: Andy McCarthy, Pat Dollard, Pam Gellar, and Liz Cheney.
5 pm –– News Hour with Greta Van Susteren and Jeffrey Lord
6 pm –– Hannity and An Empty Chair: Inspired by American hero Clint Eastwood’s moving speech at the 2012 RNC, Sean Hannity squares off for a nightly debate against Barack HUSSEIN Obama, who is represented by an empty chair. Audience members can vote-by-text for the winner for $1.99.
7 pm –– We’ll Do It Live with Bill O’Reilly
8 pm to 9:30––The Protégé: Donald Trump continues his quest to Make America Great Again TM, judging contestants competing for the right to become The Protégé, one of four aspiring candidates that Mr. Trump will self-fund with audience donations in the 2020 GOP primary. The winner will challenge Crooked Hillary in the general election.
9:30 pm to 10 pm––Behind the Scenes of The Protégé with Scott Baio: Exclusive footage and outtakes that didn’t make it to air, tips on success from Donald Trump, and a check-in with Don Jr. on his latest projects.
10 pm to 11 pm––Women Who Work with Ivanka Trump and Caitlin Jenner
11 pm to 12 am––Rockin’ Late Night with Ted Nugent
12 am to 3 am––The Women of Miss Universe After Dark
3am to 5 am––The Greatest Tweets: Wisdom from Donald Trump and a curated selection of the very best communicators scrolling as Sinatra plays.
5 am to 6 am––Pilates with Melania Trump and sidekick/towel-boy Chris Christie.
In seriousness, anyone who helps Trump to build a media company will have earned the ire appropriately aimed at those who empower callous bullies and mendacious bigots.
May it fail as a laughing stock if it launches at all.