The Grand Old Party, still getting used to the "social media" thing, somewhat naively invited the Twitter world to offer its "top issues" to help Republicans "win big" in 2014. Twitter, as always, was happy to weigh in.
Look for some of the following important issues to be making their way into candidate ads and Reince Priebus speeches soon.
- "IVE HAD MY PERIOD FOR 2 WEEKS NOW IS THIS NORMAL PLEASE HELP" (@literalporn)
- "Chemtrails" (@peterberkes)
- "There's a black guy in every mirror in my house." (@tejucole)
- "Who killed Tupac?" (@nerd_worldorder)
- "No Chipotles on Fulton St in Brooklyn" (@StephBMore)
- "Why do we only get 18 episodes of #Scandal this season?" (@RatedAR)
- "gotta be the Knicks in general, no?" (@dvsch) [Ed. – Yes.]
- "Those NBA jersey's have to be high on the list." (@MrKhalidS)
- "Men wearing pajamas." (@dennymayo)
- "Cartoon Network is getting kinda trippin" (@INeedJa_Kadeeja)
- "pants" (@edsbs)
- "i'm just starting to come to terms with my own mortality" (@cwarzel)
- "Supermarket Sweep doesn come on anymore" (@maczaddynae)
- "Too many bees." (@DeepOmega)
- "The way Beyonce says surfboard." (@KentonDunson) [For reference.]
- "sometimes i fear we'll never have a white male president" (@bdetrick)
- "Butt stuff." (@Unsilent)
And, of course:
- "twitter" (@darth)
Some of the tweets actually had real suggestions, like Crystal Wright suggesting the party "[go] after minority and women votes in 2014+2016 so we don't lose! Again." And Bill Baer suggested Benghazi, but who knows if that's ironic or not these days. And that has basically been it, so far.
To be fair, the party wasn't actually asking people to offer Twitter suggestions. The link in their tweet pointed people to an online survey that offered a somewhat narrower range of options. Or — it would have if the link worked.