Mitt Romney refuses to release his tax returns. Here's why.
Rafalca and rider. (Reuters)
Hello from Hollywood! It has come to my attention via Twitter that Mitt Romney -- the former governor of Massachusetts and current spokesman for Gillette's new line of wealth-scented deodorants -- refuses to release his tax returns.
Here's what we know: One of Mitt Romney's returns did manage to escape through his baleen. And it says that former governor Romney previously paid a tax rate of only 13.9%. That's far below what most Americans pay, even though Romney's net worth is a giant mansion made of rubies and gold.
What is even more exciting is that even as he makes use of all these tax shelters and loopholes -- special magic things available only to the wealthy -- he has proposed raising taxes by as much as $2,000 on 95 percent of Americans. Good for him. That takes balls!
But that's not even the crazy part. Here's the crazy part. This tax return where he only pays 13.9 percent in federal taxes -- this bat to the sad, tattered piñata that is American fairness -- it's apparently the good return. This is the tax return he wants us to see! In fact, Mitt Romney would rather endure weeks of bad press for hiding the rest of his tax info than just PDF the damn things and be done with it.