The married Republican Rep. Chris Lee sent a sexy topless photo of himself to a prospective date from CraigsList, and now it's all over the Internet thanks to Gawker. The most important thing to note in this story--apart from the fact that Lee lied about his marital status, lied about his job, called himself "classy", and your standard blah-blah-another-(potential)-adulterer-who-likes-to-legislate-morality--is that Lee has fairly nice abs.
Lee's office claims his Gmail was hacked, thus suggesting he didn't send those emails. But he has not denied that the picture is of him. How did he get those abs? Lee has been known to pledge to get the government off the backs of the American people. It's just so damn heavy, that government. It was a kind of resistance training, maybe.
While we would not like to be Mrs. Lee today, for the most part Maureen O'Connor's post revealing the topless photo--plus some flirty emails, including one in which Lee calls himself a "very fit fun classy guy"--has sparked an Internet joke contest. Here are a few of the jokes you can steal:
Slate's Dave Weigel: "'Days Since a Sex Scandal' Sign Outside Congress Set Back to Zero"
Wonkette's Jack Stuef: "Chris Lee is never going to hear the end of this one from his Republican colleagues! 'You were caught in the beginning stage of sexting an adult woman, Chris-bro? Did it excite you how legal that was or something?'"
Stuef, again: "So what is Chris Lee’s fantasy image of himself, according to these e-mails? He’s a divorced 39-year-old lobbyist. Those are the lies he told this woman, and, considering this scandal, actually all of that may soon come true for him. Except the being 39 part. He’s 46."
Wonkette commenter V572625694: "What kind of sick twisted fuck would pretend to be a lobbyist?"
Gawker commenter Cookie Guggleman: "Guess that woman didn't want to better know his district."
Jamie Dupree: "IS SOMETHING IN THE WATER? The district of Rep Chris Lee (R-NY) borders that of former Rep Eric Massa (D-NY)"
Eliot Nelson: "Let's not believe everything we read: Maybe Chris Lee went on Craigslist to sell that painting behind him in the shirtless photo"