Tomorrow is the moment of truth for Scott McInnis, the Republican gubernatorial hopeful in Colorado who got tripped up by a plagiarism scandal--and if you act now, you can own this handsome commemorative pen to mark the occasion. That's right: for a short time, the Scott McInnis Plagiarism Pen is available and it can be yours! The Plagiarism Pen comes loaded with many state-of-the-art features, like ink. It also has a rubber grip, so your fingers won't slip while you're appropriating someone else's intellectual property as your own. It will also help you grow hair. Other writing utensils can cost as much as $10 or more. But the Scott McInnis Plagiarism Pen can be yours for the one-time low, low price of only
$9... no, $7...wait, can we even do this?!...we can?...Jesus, okay then: ONLY $5!!! That's right, folks, follow this link to the good folks at ProgressNow Colorado and add the Scott McInnis Plagiarism Pen to your family's cherished keepsakes. Operators are standing by. Tell 'em Josh Green sent you.
We want to hear what you think about this article. Submit a letter to the editor or write to firstname.lastname@example.org.