Alvin Greene's Doll-Based Economic Plan

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If you're not familiar with Alvin Greene, he is the South Carolina Senate candidate whose victory in the Democratic primary was so shocking it was met by fellow Democrats with accusations of foul play. Greene, an unemployed accused felon with no campaign staff or apparent knowledge of politics, is so bad at campaigning that some interviewers have wondered about his mental fitness.

But make no mistake, Alvin Greene has ideas. He recently suggested that Time declare him Man of the Year. And now we have discovered Alvin Greene's economic stimulus plan: making and selling action figures of Alvin Greene. Greene told the Guardian:

Another thing we can do for jobs is make toys of me, especially for the holidays. Little dolls. Me. Like maybe little action dolls. Me in an army uniform, air force uniform, and me in my suit. They can make toys of me and my vehicle, especially for the holidays and Christmas for the kids. That’s something that would create jobs. So you see I think out of the box like that. It’s not something a typical person would bring up. That’s something that could happen, that makes sense. It’s not a joke.
  • A Joke Is What He's Become  The Guardian's Ed Pilkington explains, "Similar statements made by Greene in the days since his victory have allowed the media, most recently on the Huffington Post yesterday, to present him in precisely that way – as a joke."
  • Why Not?  The New Republic's Jonathan Chait calls this "Thinking Outside The Box On Jobs. Far, Far Outside." He quips, "I say we give it a try."
  • Is He For Real?  Outside the Beltway's Doug Mataconis writes, "Since the primary, I’ve vacillated between the idea that Alvin Greene is pulling off some kind of enormous practical joke and the idea that he’s just, well, totally nuts. After reading that Guardian interview, I’m as confused as ever."
  • I've Heard Worse  Salon's Alex Pareene sighs, "Everyone's been making fun of him for saying this today, but that would be a way more effective jobs plan than anything Rand Paul or Sharron Angle have come up with."
  • Still Better than Bush  Jason Kuznicki shrugs, "Compared to endless war, stripping us of our civil liberties, running up giant budget deficits, and all the rest… I have to say I’m all in favor Greene’s proposal. Politicians have limited time. Let’s use it wisely. Or at least use it up."

For discussion purposes, the Atlantic Wire's Toy Research and Development department has kindly mocked up two such Greene action figures. Collect them all and save the economy!

This article is from the archive of our partner The Wire.