'ACORN Won't Give Me a Pony'

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ACORN was back in the news today when a public poll found that 26 percent of Americans believe the disgraced organization "stole" the election for Barack Obama. While some bloggers took the figures in earnest, others sarcastically joked that stealing the presidency is just one of ACORN's innumerable sins. Spotlighting a wide range of fictional trespasses, these sardonic Americans took to Twitter Thursday to set the record straight on ACORN. What else have they done?

Postracialist: "ACORN dipped Sammy Sosa into a vat of self-hate and bleach"

Tami Swenson: "ACORN has annual mammograms starting at age 40"

Lindsay Beyerstein: "ACORN is seeking yellow cake uranium in Niger"

Jeffrey Lebowski: " helped OJ get away with murder"

Tealdeer: "ACORN will be running the death panels"

Joseph J. Santorsa:
"ACORN was the other shooter on the grassy knoll"

ACORN: "ACORN won't give you a pony"

David Mote: "ACORN made me gay"

Adam Serwer: "
ACORN introduced Thomas Jefferson to a "Ms. Hemmings"

Curtis Abbey: "
ACORN stole the Lindberg Baby, and registered him as a Democrat"

ACORN stole all of Sarah Palin's newspapers"

Moti Rieber:
"ACORN is Sarah Palin's factchecker"

was 'hiking' on the Appalachian Trail"

Erin McGrath: "ACORN is balloon boy's read dad"

Patrick Crowley: "ACORN caused global warming"

The Eclectic Negro:
ACORN told Belichick to go for it on fourth down"

This article is from the archive of our partner The Wire.