I normally find myself a relatively harsh judge of films, but I just can't bring myself to concur with the general tone of approbation I'm hearing about this movie. Hokey dialogue? Charming. Plot that doesn't really make sense?


Well, it's a movie about a kid who got bit by a radioactive spider, thus granting him the ability to stick to things, a "spidey sense" to warn of him danger, and the "proportionate strength of a spider" and, meanwhile, by coincidence he just so happens to have developed a technological apparatus to help him shoot spider webs so, no, the part about a particle accelerator misshap turning Flint Marko into a sand monster doesn't make sense either.

UPDATE: By "approbation" up top I of course mean "disapprobation." Promises I may have made about cutting down on typos are no longer operative.