My "holiday" present to myself -- a pair of Gilbert Arenas signature sneakers. Two problems with this product. One is that Adidas unwisely named them the "Gil Zeros" instead of the "Agent Zeros" or the "Hibachi" or something cool. The other is that despite my hopes, I'm not actually noticing any substantial increase in my quickness and athleticism. On the upside, the random dudes hanging around the parking lot outside of Lowest Price Gas on 14th and W were duly impressed and they're significantly bigger than my 1997-vintage Sambas and I think I could probably get listed at 6'2" wearing them.

Meanwhile, word to the wise for any non-celebrators in the DC area: The Red Room, unlike virtually all other establishments, is open on Christmas Eve, starting at 9:30PM. The scene, based on last year's experience, is a little grim, but it's better than nothing . . . various Jewish liberal media figures will be in attendance.