That’s the question this reader asked herself following many lost pregnancies:
Ever since I can remember I wanted to be a mother. I don’t know why, but I just knew it was what I wanted. When my husband and I first started dating two weeks into the relationship, I found out I was pregnant. We were stupid, young, and used no protection. He was terrified, I was happy.
A month later I woke up covered in blood, and after being rushed to the hospital, we found out we lost it. I cried and cried, and we fought, and I was sure he would leave me. But he didn’t, and six months later I was pregnant again. This time he was happy at first and kissed my stomach. Then we got into a car accident and found out the baby didn’t survive.
I was numb. After two years, I had had five miscarriages.