'It Takes a Special Kind of Freak to Make This Work'

The popular reader series on non-monogamy continues—and it takes a few rockier paths. The first:

My wife and I have been together nearly ten years, and a few years back we made the decision to open our marriage sexually. The initial hope was that adding new partners would rekindle our own sexual connection, which was the only aspect of our relationship we didn’t consider fantastic. One year ago we began our explorations in earnest, with a laundry list of rules—no sleepovers, no romantic emotions, etc.

The rules quickly evaporated after my wife developed a strong love with her first partner, and I couldn’t bear to break them apart. I went into a depressive, anxious state, and I quit drinking so I could better understand my feelings.