Leaving the Bedroom Door Open

A reader responds to Olga’s post on OkCupid’s new feature that allows users to advertise they’re “in an open relationship” and link to their partner’s profile:

I have a life partner of three years and counting. We are in the most functional, devoted, and fulfilling romantic relationship that either one of us has ever had. We have positions of employment, we have careers, and we do not want to have children (life and three cats are more than enough for us). We share a life, a home, and a bed. And, we are in an open relationship.

It’s one we mutually agreed upon when we became serious about being together in a more serious way, to keep open for as long as it worked for us. Just because we are in an open relationship, it does not mean that we are looking to have sex with whomever we find attractive in the moment. We have had ONE threesome in the three-years-plus we have been together. Only one.

We are both sexual, but our professional lives can be quite demanding. I honestly do not know why people think we are having more sex simply because we are in an open relationship. Then again, a lot of people think a lot of things that simply are not true.

Another reader also describes his open relationship: