The Ass Baton Goes to School

Airhead High: Home of the Stoners

Could this be Airhead High? (Fast Times at Ridgemont High, via YouTube)

Recently I mentioned that during service on the jury in a Washington D.C. criminal trial, I had been alarmed to hear a police officer nonchalantly talk about catching a fleeing suspect from behind and then whacking him with an “ass baton.”

When the trial was over, the judge explained what had really been going on.*

This is the category of language mix-ups known as Mondegreens. A reader adds:

I once sat through an honors ceremony in college in which people kept referring to Airhead High School. I was very upset; did any school deserve such a derogatory term?

After a while, I saw a program, and came to understand that it was Arrowhead High School. That's what a Wisconsin accent can do to the language.

* Explanation of the “ass baton”: It’s actually an “ASP baton,” as explained in the earlier post. But no one says it the way it’s spelled. As one friend pointed out: “The P  is silent. Like the pee in pneumonia. Or in swimming pool.”