Eli Roth is the Natalie Portman of Circumcision (UPDATED)
The horror director Eli Roth (who once hosted Quentin Tarantino at a seder, which I would have paid money to see) takes on Russell Crowe for attacking circumcision. Roth, who also starred in "Inglourious Bastards" and takes a muscular, almost Mamet-like, approach to Judaism, is becoming the Natalie Portman of circumcision. You'll recall that Natalie Portman (yes, the same Natalie Portman who ranked lower on the Jerusalem Post's list of the world's top 50 most influential Jews than moi) took a stand for her people by condemning the antisemitism of that ridiculous designer John Galliano. Well, Eli Roth is doing the same, on behalf of Jewish penises. (It really does seem like Jewish Penis Week in the culture, doesn't it? I mean, Iran is racing to get a nuclear bomb, the Arab Spring is disintegrating, but Jewish penises -- there's an important issue).
In any case, Roth, who is a deep Jew, especially by Hollywood standards (I'm convinced that Hostel is a Shoah movie), had a pretty good comeback to Crowe's rantings:
Russell Crowe went on an anti-circumcision tirade on Twitter late Thursday and early Friday morning.
"Circumcision is barbaric and stupid. Who are you to correct nature? Is it real that GOD requires a donation of foreskin? Babies are perfect," he wrote.
When one follower called the practice hygenic, Crowe replied, "Hygenic? Why don't you sew up your ass then?"
He then implored his "Jewish friends" to stop ceremonial circumcision.
"many jewish friends, I love my Jewish friends, I love the apples and the honey and the funny little hats but stop cutting yr babies @eliroth" he wrote to his Man With an Iron Fist director. (Snapped back Roth on Twitter: "You didn't seem to be complaining when I was recutting you this afternoon...")
UPDATE: Eli Roth is now defending Russell Crowe on his Twitter feed.
UPDATE 2: Several Goldblog readers have pointed out just how adorable it is that Russell Crowe knows about apples and honey.
UPDATE 3: No, anonymous e-mailers, Russell Crowe is not the new Mel Gibson. Mel Gibson is an antisemite. Russell Crowe is simply attached to his foreskin. It's different.
UPDATE 4: Eli Roth on Twitter:
FILM BLOGS TAKE NOTE - @THR @Huffpost @TheAtlantic and others are now terrifying stars into not saying any jokes on twitter.