My boyfriend has figured out how to avoid luggage fees on airlines: he wears most of the clothes he needs for a trip onto the plane. He wears three shirts, three pairs of socks, and—here’s the problem—three pairs of underwear beneath his pants, which are very tight at this point. He flies often, and says he saves a lot of money by doing this. Is he nuts?
S. C., Kansas City, Mo.
Dear S. C.,
No, he is not nuts. His sense of frugality, and fashion, is to be commended. I am fiercely opposed to the hidden (and not-so-hidden) fees imposed on the flying public by desperate and rapacious airlines, so anyone who battles against them deserves praise. His behavior does raise one troubling question: How does he transport his underwear on the flight home? Is he wearing three pairs of dirty shorts at the same time? If so, then you ought to have a heartfelt discussion with him. Should his plane crash, you would not want to risk embarrassment (on top of the death or dismemberment of your boyfriend) when rescue personnel discover his dirty underwear in triplicate.
I’m about to be married. I’ve never worn jewelry, and I’d prefer not to wear a wedding band. But my wife-to-be insists that we both display evidence of our marriage on our fingers. Is there any argument you can think of as to why I should be exempt from this rule? Don’t you think the requirement that all men must wear a wedding band is a creation of the wedding-ring industry?