The Neurotic's Notebook


If you can tell someone about it, it’s not the worst thing you ever did.

We are like people with shortterm leases on summer cottages; we can never seem to make our provisions come out even with our stay.

There are always a few people you do a lot for, and a few who do a lot for you, but they’re not the same people.

At the first quarrel, a woman dreams of a brand-new love which would not be sullied, like this one.

If you know of wounding things to say, sooner or later you’ll say them.

The most eloquent descriptions of virtue come from those who do not possess it, and, indeed, they have the best vantage point for its appraisal.

If it’s made of chopped chicken, they now call it a chickenburger, but what if it’s made of chopped ham?

Others follow patterns; we alone are unpredictable.

Women gather together to wear silly hats, eat dainty food, and forget how unresponsive their husbands are. Men gather together to talk sports, eat heavy food, and forget how demanding their wives are. Only where children gather is there any real chance of fun.