English Preversification

By MARK IDEN

SINCE you can sleep and say you’ve slept,
And wake and say you’ve woken,
Why can’t I peep and say I’ve pept?
Why don’t I say that birds have chept
And felt themselves forsaken
In trees the rain has shoken?

Though you may win and say you’ve won,
Or get and say you’ve gotten,
The clouds may thin, but haven’t thon;
And, though I grin, I haven’t gron
At frocks the rain has wot ten
On pretty girls I’ve potten.

If you can dream and say you’ve dreamt,
And if you freeze you’re frozen,
Why can’t I say that frost has gleamt
On icy fields where crows have screamt
And winter winds have whozen?
Why don’t I say I’ve snozen?

Since you can sit and say you’ve sat,
And rise and say you’ve risen,
I’d like to speak of drinks I’ve splat,
And tell of times when care has flat
Away quite unsurmisen.
But no— I’d be chastisen!

Perhaps you think (perhaps I’ve thought
While writing what I’ve written)
I link for spite these words I’ve lought,
To hoodwink some. But who’s hoodwought?
And who, I ask, is spitten
By what I’ve just inditten?