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OK, so, don't panic, but one of the corniest trends of the 90s seems to be making a comeback. And the apocalypse wasn't supposed to be for another week or so! Two alleged UFO sightings on opposite coasts this week captured the attention of semi-local news sources and now people are actually talking about them. 

The neighborhood blog Mission Mission in San Francisco picked up a reader submitted, expletive-laden YouTube video of some mysterious lights hovering above of a park. 

"I wasn’t sure if at first if it was another Tequila hazed mirage, but myself and a few bi-standars where all in complete awe at the lights we saw on Valencia," the reader told Mission Mission. At least he admitted he was drunk. An expert told CBS affiliate KCBS it was probably balloons with lights attached (boring), and at best the Tequila was influencing Enrique's conspiracy theory. SFist guessed it was probably Chinese lanterns, like the ones you would light at someone's wedding. You really have to max out the video quality to see what exactly they think is a UFO, so we got this helpful screen grab: 

Meanwhile, in Brooklyn: more crazy pants UFO sights! First picked up by the UFO Sightings Daily blog before appearing on Gothamist and Daily Intel, this expletive laden video is apparently of the second sighting of... mysterious lights: 

"There were three orbs glowing like fire and again flying in formation. Each of the three finally stopped at the same point in the sky, hovered, and then disappeared," the eyewitness says. There doesn't seem to be any sort of chemical influence on this person's conspiracy theory, but you never know sometimes. Daily Intel's Dan Amira thinks the lights are just airplanes. So does one of the commenters on that UFO blog. Gothamist's Jen Carlson seems to imply we're not going to meet the apocalypse in eleven days, as the Mayans predicted, but instead meet our new alien overlords. (Whatever they're smoking in the Gothamist office, please, pass it to the left.) Again, you have to max out the video quality to make out the aliens so we grabbed this helpful screen grab: 

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