Of course the unfortunate subplot of this ordeal has been the story of Captain Francesco Schettino, or as The New York Post prefers to call him, "The Chicken of The Sea." The BBC reported last night that Schettino told investigators he ordered the turn too late. "I was navigating by sight because I knew the depths well and I had done this maneuver three or four times," he reportedly said, recalling events that presumably happened before he "accidentally abandoned ship by falling into a lifeboat." Proving that there are still some people in the world willing to vouch for Schettino, his brother-in-law and priest have come to his defense. Schettino "managed to avoid a tragedy -- it could have been worse," his brother-in-law told an Italian paper, which CNN translated today. "He was not running away, he came down [from the ship] to survey the damage," Russo said. Schettino's priest offered up a very unfortunate play on words, accusing the media of "killing him."
"Already there are all these dead people, do we want to add another one to the list?" said Schettino's priest, not quite cognizant of his face-palm inducing metaphor.