Here is an excellent theory about my visit to Cuba, from a prominent antisemite named Jeffrey Gates (h/t Harry's Place):

Goldberg reports he was "summoned" to Havana to discuss Castro's fears of a global nuclear war. After conceding in the interview that the 1962 Cuban Missile Crisis "wasn't worth it," Castro turned to a theme of topical importance to Tel Aviv, insisting that the Iranian government must understand that Jews "were expelled from their land, persecuted and mistreated all over the world."

Knowing Cuba's pre-revolution alliance with Meyer Lansky and other kingpins in Jewish organized crime, one must wonder if this "journalist" was dispatched to commence negotiations for gambling concessions as a means to fill the Castro government's depleted coffers.

The recent relaxation of restrictions on travel to Cuba may signal a pending return to Cuba's "glory days" as a nearby haven for organized crime.

Castro's well-timed comments about persecuted Jews may have been a signal that Cuba is again open for business -- any business.

Gates is obviously a great investigator. How could he possibly have known that on August 12th, Bugsy Siegel summoned me from the Atlantic offices at the Watergate (coincidence that I work at the Watergate? I don't think so) to Wolfie's Deli in Miami Beach, where I found the diminutive Meyer Lansky in his usual booth, slurping borscht. "We have a job for you, Goldblog," Lansky says.

"I thought you were dead, Meyer," I said. "You were killed at the end of Godfather II."

"Shut your piehole," he said, pushing a thick envelope toward me. "Here," he said. "This is from me, Dutch and Bugsy," he said. "Give it to Fidel."

"Fidel?" I asked, surprised.

"Yeah, you're going to see Fidel. There's a Pan Am Clipper leaving at 2 for Havana. Be on it."

 "The Pan Am Clipper?" I asked.

"Yeah. Got a problem with it?"

"The Pan Am Clipper is as dead as the Jewish mob," I said.

"Who you calling dead?" Bugsy said, sliding into the booth next to Meyer.  He pulled out a gat and aimed it at my kishkes. "Get on that plane, Goldblog, or you'll be floating to Cuba," Bugsy said.

What could I do? This is the brutal way of the Jewish mob. I went to Cuba (collecting a bunch of Pan Am frequent flyer miles for my troubles), and gave Fidel the envelope.

Was it worth it? Who knows? I got some good quotes out of the meeting, and also, I'm the new owner of the Hotel Nacional.  I don't know much about managing a casino, but I do know entertainment. For the first big show, we have Dean Martin and Sammy Davis, Jr.

I hope Meyer approves.

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