Earlier this month, I received an intriguing email that appeared to be from Donald Trump. “Can you keep a secret?” the subject line asked. The small print at the bottom of the email clarified that it was actually from a joint fundraising committee composed of Donald J. Trump for President, Inc. and the Republican National Committee. “I have exciting news to share,” the email began, as if in Trump’s voice, “but you have to keep it a secret.”
The secret was a “HUGE” surprise birthday gift for the first lady. In the email’s telling, my help was needed to pull this off. “Melania does so much for our Nation and I want to make sure she knows just how much she means to us,” it stated. “I want to surprise her with a birthday card signed by 1 MILLION Americans from all around the Country.”
Melania’s birthday is today. And now that there’s no risk of ruining any surprise, I want to send her a message through this article, having refrained from responding to the email.
You see, although I am more than happy to help give Melania the gift of birthday wishes from a million Americans, I began to suspect that Trump and his RNC allies had ulterior motives when they sent that email––that they were exploiting the first lady’s birthday as a pretext to add to their databases.