And we're back! (Spoilers ahead.) The Good Wife season 6 premiere started right where the finale left off, with Eli Gold asking Alicia Florrick if she'd consider running for District Attorney. Alicia's reaction is the same reaction the rest of the Good Wife writing room had when they heard the idea: "What?" Then dissent. And then, maybe in two episodes, slow acceptance.
The season opener had the daunting task of getting us onboard with a lot of crazy plots: Alicia considering running for district attorney; Diane Lockhart making a play to join Florrick Agos; and, most implausible of all, Cary Agos being thrown in jail for assisting in the transportation of $1.3 million worth of heroin. And for the most part it succeeded. We can see how each of the characters got to the point they are now.
Winners: Finn Polmar and the State's Attorney's Office
Losers: Florrick Agos (& Lockhart?)
We remain very, very skeptical of this Cary in jail subplot, even if it does give one of the best platonic couples — Finn and Alicia — a chance to spar.
This episode also served as a reminder that Cary's dad is the worst. When he tells Alicia and Diane to call his dad to ask for help with bail — his wealthy father offered up paltry $8,000 out of $1.3 million — they look at him like he's the last puppy left the animal shelter.
At the same time, Lemond Bishop hasn't killed him yet, so maybe Cary did have a good episode.
Winner: Diane Lockhart
Losers: David Lee and Louis Canning
We're calling this one early in Diane's favor. On the one hand, David Lee and Canning are using Cary's drug bust (that phrase sounds ridiculous every single time) to stop Diane's clients from leaving. She's leaving the company she started from the ground up to go to a start up in a warehouse run by kids. But Diane has a plan.
Winner: Eli Gold, Alicia Florrick
Loser: James Castro
After last season's "wait, what?" moment when Eli suggests that Alicia run for her philandering husband's former job, Eli forces the issue by starting a fight between Castro and Peter. The moment is even funnier with the added father-daughter moment between Eli and Miranda.
For whatever reason, Miranda spent this episode hanging around the governor's office after getting fired from the juice bar. When Castro storms out of Peter's office, just as Eli planned, she turns to her dad and says, "I want to learn your job. I think I'd be good at it."
Winner: Lauren, the "Panties Optional" intern
Loser: Eli Gold, everyone
If you're trying to keep your prostitute-toe-sucking boss from engaging in another career ruining affair, then being bested by the red headed intern who doesn't wear underwear (to the knowledge of the entire staff) probably isn't helping.
At the same time, all of us are little worse off for having to deal with her character. As Peter put it, she's like "a cat in heat." She's not a real person. Real people do not flash their sexual organs in the lobbies of their offices. Then again, real people probably file sexual harassment suits when their boss's assistant's daughter asks them if they have panties on. It's all very absurd.
This article is from the archive of our partner The Wire.