Women's Halloween costumes have reached peak sexiness—you can now be a sexy pizza, and some people would view that as progress. "Isn't it great? The fact that women get this one night, only one, out of the whole year to be viewed as sexual objects," senior correspondent Kristen Schaal said. "And we get to choose what kind." Schaal ran through some of the dozens of options ladies have for Halloween: sexy pirate, sexy nurse, even sexier nurse, sexy defense attorney or "her nemesis," the sexy prosecutor. "'You're out of order.' 'No, you're out of order.' 'Oh, let's just make out.' 'Yeah,'" Schaal added.
So no, The Daily Show's correspondent on women's issues isn't upset about the hypersexualized nature of Halloween costumes. "Why would I be upset about progress?" she said. Back in the oppressive olden day of the last generation, she said, her mother only had two costume options: sexy secretary and sexy meter maid. "But," she said, "in these modern, liberated times a woman is free to be a sexy whatever the hell she wants."
Not that men should be left out. Here's Schaal's sexy Hollywood Producer costume for men:
"Tell me this costume isn't dead sexy?" Schaal asked. And for women, she suggested ladies stop being so coy. Why be a sexy _____ when you can just be "the place where sex happens," as she put it.
And, as with all things, if you want to make your sexy vagina costume even sexier, hang a pizza on it. "Does the cheese match the crust?" Schaal asked. "Ooh, she'll never tell." Some things are better left to the imagination?
This article is from the archive of our partner The Wire.