One Direction fans are, uh, excitable. If anything bad happens to their beloved boys, they tend to fly off the handle right away and have an ugly habit of, well, threatening to kill those who cross their favorite boys.
In case you just emerged from the mole society at the center of the earth, One Direction is a group of pretty boys from England and Ireland. There's Niall Horan, Zayn Malik, Liam Payne, Louis Tomlinson and the boy-king Harry Styles. Teenagers, twenty-year-olds and adults follow their every move with a religious fervor. It can be slightly terrifying for outside observers who aren't well-versed in their ways. Like religious figures, should you harm one of the boys you will find yourself on the wrong end of some scary death threats. That's what Aston Villa striker Gabriel Agbonlahor learned the hard way on Sunday after he tackled Louis Tomlinson during a charity soccer match:
Look at the floppy haired boy flop around after being tackled by that big brute of a professional soccer player. The horror! In response, One Direction threatened to kill the guy on Twitter:
There are even more death threats rounded up here by Fox Soccer's Thomas Hautman. As Hautman points out, Tomlinson is signed to non-professional contract with the Doncaster Rovers. Tomlinson plays his first game with the club on September 18, so it's not like he doesn't know his way around a pitch. Sometimes tackles go wrong and you get injured. It's not a big deal.
But it's the Directioners that took things too far. Again. This is a recurring pattern with One Directioners, after all. Something happens to the boys that bothers them and then kill, kill, kill! In July, British GQ put all five boys on their September issue cover. In response, Directioners threatened to "shove bleach into [British GQ's] [bums] and pull out [British GQ's] eyes with a spork," among other things. That doesn't even cover the threats directed at the American GQ, who had nothing to do with the One Direction covers at all. One Directioners also threatened to kill members of The Who after it was rumored the seminal 70s rock band was going to sue the youngsters over similarities between One Direction's "Best Song Ever" and The Who's "Baba O'Riley." God forbid you end up dating one of the One Direction boys. Then it really gets ugly.
So, thankfully, things seem to be changing within the One Direction community. Some fans are trying to calm the more murderous ones by pointing out that maybe threatening to kill anyone who touches your boyband heroes isn't a great idea:
Cooler heads seem to be prevailing. Now please don't kill me for writing this.
This article is from the archive of our partner The Wire.