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Welcome to the Smart Set. Every morning we bring you the gossip coverage, filtered. Today: Amanda Bynes may be a bit troubled, Chris Brown in another violent episode, and Minka and Jake's secret love affair.

Hm. Might the Amanda Bynes situation be a bit more complicated than a young person who stupidly drank and drove? The She's the Man actress (is that the best one? The What a Girl Wants actress? The All That actress?) was arrested recently after supposedly side-swiping a police car and refusing a breathalyzer, so everyone was like "Uh oh, Amanda Bynes was boozin' and cruisin'." But apparently she took a test down at the station and blew a negative so who knows? Now Bynes says she can prove she wasn't drinking through testimony from friends (is testimony proof?), and doesn't need Barack Obama after all, though she tweeted at him with a request for help not too long ago. So maybe she's not drinking, but she might be losing it in other ways. People who are supposedly close to her say that she's been acting really weird lately and that she claims to have a boyfriend that nobody's met. What, she met him at summer camp, you wouldn't know him? He lives in Canada? What kind of fake mysterious boyfriend are we talking about here? This is all a little unnerving. As is Bynes' entire Twitter feed, not just that one weird tweet to the president. Guys, should we be worried about Amanda Bynes? [Page Six]

Good grief, Chris Brown was in another fight. Yup. He and his crew were at a nightclub in New York City when they ran into Canadian teen soap actor-turned-rapper Aubrey "Drake" Graham's crew and then there was a scuffle. Brown got a bottle thrown at his face and tweeted a picture to prove it. He's got some sort of gash on his chin and, in the tweet, is apparently mad at "rich ni**as that hate." He's since removed the tweet and the photo, but of course TMZ, our nation's premier archivists, has them both. So, what's going on, Chris? Why is a guy who was on the show Degrassi — may we remind the court that your beloved "Drake" is actually a teen soap star named Aubrey Graham who was on Degrassi: The Next Generation for years, years, guys, many years — throwing bottles at you, Chris? What's going on? Why all of this, all the time? Are you Amanda Bynes' secret boyfriend? Are you guys going crazy together? Because this has to stop. All of this Chris Brown stuff. Just cool it, kid. Cool it down. Stop fighting, stop hitting, stop tweeting, stop all of it. Be an adult, a good adult. Just stop being such a stupid idiot jerk. You too, Aubrey. Remember what happened to Jimmy, the character you played for years on Degrassi: The Next Generation, got involved in bullying. That Jimmy got shot. He got shot, Aubrey. Shot. Let that be a lesson about violence. OK, now everyone get out of my classroom. I don't want to look at any of your faces anymore. [TMZ]

It seems that Yankee dater Minka Kelly and muscly Persian prince Jake Gyllenhaal had a secret romance sometime ago that basically nobody knew about. He'd been trying to woo her for a while, because she seems safe and knows Taylor Kitsch, but she resisted until she broke up with Wilmer Valderrama. Ha, Jake. Oops. You were second to Wilmer Valderrama. Does that feel good? Probably not. Anyway, they canoodled for a while (celebrities canoodle, normal people date) but they never quite hit it off. Probably because Minka kept freaking out on airplanes and Jake kept suggesting they hang out with Taylor Kitsch and Zach Gilford and that maybe she could go shopping while the guys hung out back at the house if she wanted. [Us Weekly]

Oh good god, they have announced the cast of Bachelor Pad 3, the show that throws a bunch of Bachelor/Bachelorette rejects into a house together and locks all the doors and sets the place on fire, and it sounds exciting. Most exciting is that Kalon, the fool from this season of The Bachelorette who arrived to the show in a helicopter and then made unwise remarks about the Bachelorette's kid, will be gracing us with his presence. Also the guy who won the game (oh yeah, there are competitions and a cash prize) last time but lost his fiancee. Plus people named Erica Rose and Rachel Trueheart, who, judging by their names, are robots created by ABC's Wondermagination laboratories in the hopes of one day opening a Bachelor-themed animatronic learning adventure ride at Epcot. Happy viewing, all! [People]

Singer R. Kelly apparently owes the IRS almost $5 million in back taxes. When asked to comment on the matter, Kelly told reporters "I believe I can fly... to a non-extradition country where the tax man can't get me, see you in hell, IRS!" No, no, someone from his camp assures us that Kelly is working it all out and that all will be fine. Which we believe. If they're not getting him for peeing on a teenager, they're not getting him for stupid old taxes. You can count on that. [TMZ]

Leonardo DiCaprio and his public health social worker girlfriend Erin Heatherton, haha just kidding his Victoria's Secret model girlfriend Erin Heatherton, took in a play in New York on Tuesday night. They saw the recent Tony award winner for Best Musical Once. No word yet on whether they enjoyed the show, but at curtain call DiCaprio could be seen sizing up the talent on stage, scanning for any wayward underpants models, while Heatherton gnawed quietly on her program and fiddled with the mittens that were clipped to the sleeves of her coat. What a couple! [Page Six]

You know how Barack Obama has been auctioning off dinner dates with himself and a celebrity, like George Clooney and Sarah Jessica Parker, recently? Well, he'll be doing more of that, but now apparently you get to pick the celebrity. Yeah he's so connected to Hollywood stars that he's confident enough to let randos pick instead of trusted insiders. So, who will it be? We have our choices! Want to hear them? OK, well, and we know it's a long shot because he's a pretty big star, but our first choice would be, duhhh, legendary rocker Ted Nugent. And then if he's not available, Northern Exposure star Janine Turner. Good choices right?? And we suppose if Turner isn't available, and she might not be, she is very busy these days, we'd settle for SNL's Victoria Jackson. So what do you think, Obama campaign? Can you do that for us? We'll literally pay anything. Make it happen! [Reliable Source]

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