[Lindsay Lohan appeared healthy, upbeat, and pulled together (if somewhat surgically adjusted) and—putting to rest speculation that she might crash and burn spectacularly on live television—comported herself just fine in what proved to be an uneven episode. She poked fun at her train-wreck reputation in the monologue (in which she was subjected to assorted drug tests by the SNL cast) and played herself as a prisoner in the show's recurring "Scared Straight" sketch. Jimmy Fallon and Jon Hamm made cameos. Musical guest Jack White performed "Love Interruption" (backed by Ruby Amanfu and an all-female band) and "Sixteen Saltines" (with an all-male band).]
Bill Hader as a Norman Bates-esque Shepard Smith ("I'm a shy little possum...") interviews a creepy Mitt Romney and family, including sons Tagg, Tiggy, and Tic Tac, and diehard supporter Kidd Rock (Andy Samberg), who performs his new song ("He's Mitt Romney...get the eff out of his way...")
From the creators of the Real Housewives of Atlanta and the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, it's the Real Housewives of Disney—featuring Snow White (Vanessa Bayer), Rapunzel (Lindsay Lohan), Jasmine (Nasim Pedrad), Belle (Abby Elliott), Prince Charming (Taran Killam), and "huge @#$@#$ing mess" Cinderella (Kristin Wiig).
Loonier-than-ever James Carville (Bill Hader) drops by Weekend Update to discuss Rush Limbaugh's inappropriate comments about Georgetown law student Sandra Fluke and to describe his efforts in the '90s to pick off Newt Gingrich with the help of alligators.
Live from Las Vegas, it's the 2012 Psychic Awards, hosted by cruise ship psychic Dan Bernando (Andy Samberg) and "Lovely Lucy" (Lindsay Lohan), featuring a look ahead to "the psychics and magicians we're going to lose in the coming year..."
House sitter Megan (Lindsay Lohan) helps out Kristin Wiig, a woman terrorized by her own butt-dials.
Also: Snooki (Bobby Moynihan) drops by Weekend Update to discuss her rumored pregnancy (and is interrupted by Jon Hamm, who reveals himself to be the father); Taran Killam and Bobby Moynihan host "the least listened-to hip hop show in Shakopee, Minnesota" with help from intern "Illiterate Lisa" (Lindsay Lohan); Jason Sudeikis as "weird guy by a fire."
NEXT, on March 10: Jonah Hill, with musical guest The Shins.