Welcome to the Smart Set. Every morning we bring you the gossip coverage, filtered. Today: Justin Bieber might still be a daddy?; the royals get flirty and foody; America has a new dance champion.
Though Mariah Yeater has dropped her paternity lawsuit against golden nymph-boy Justin Bieber, she still plans to submit her baby for DNA testing. All this according to her "legal team," because everyone in America has a legal team these days. Bieber himself has already taken a paternity test, but Yeater's lawyers don't fully trust the results, as no one from Yeater's family was present at the time of the test. So who knows, something exciting could yet still come of all this. Most exciting, probably, is when in 18 years this child goes onto their nano wrist computer and does a Bing search (ha, it won out in the end! somehow!) and finds this whole story and reads about itself and realizes its mom is maybe not the best. And possibly that his dad is very, very rich. That will definitely be the most exciting part. Good luck, kid. [TMZ]
Another year, another Dancing With the Stars victor crowned. Last night wounded war veteran J..R. Martinez took home the magic glitter ball trophy, besting the male Kardashian, Rob, who came in second place. So that was your choice, America. A badly scarred vet who now does motivational speaking, and a Kardashian. Let's just say that everyone's glad you made the right choice. It probably improves our international standing, even just a little bit. Many countries still haven't forgiven us for Ke$ha, but at least we didn't elect a Kardashian into office. (The winner of Dancing With the Stars is given a plum political appointment, right?) [EW]
Angelina Jolie, one famously wild and weird and into blood and knives, says she's tempered a bit since those crazy days, as people who grow older are wont to do. While being vague about exactly how wild she ever got, Jolie told 60 Minutes for an interview airing Sunday, "I didn't die young, so I'm very lucky. There are other artists and people who didn't survive certain things." Hmm... "certain things"?? Very mysterious. Of course Jolie did many crazy things back in her 20s, so she could be talking about anything. Anything from marrying Billy Bob Thornton to starring in Playing By Heart. You just never know. Jolie says that she still has some bad girl business within her, but that it all goes to her husband Brad Pitt. That probably means something sexy, but we like to think she's saying that she demands that Brad give her a vial of his blood every week so she can wear it around her neck, and that Pitt stays up late into the night sometimes polishing her knife collection. Ah, married life. [People]
Rowrrrr. America-visiting Prince Harry was at a Las Vegas nightclub on Sunday night and now there is video of the young lordling chatting it up with some vivacious Vegas vixen. The video isn't terribly scandalous, it's really just Harry leaning in to talk to the bird in the middle of a nightclub, but we can all infer what happened next... Harry's security team gently escorted her away and Harry finished his cranberry juice and then went upstairs to his room for bed because he had lots of important stuff to do the next day, important stuff like helping old people with things and calling his grandmother. (Shh... the Queen might reading this... Act natural...) [TMZ]
While on the topic of royals, newly minted Duchess Kate Middleton was recently spotted grocery shopping like a regular commoner in a big sweater turtleneck. She bought: "bananas, chicken, milk, potatoes, oranges, cereal, Haagen-Dazs ice cream, lettuce." How boring. No Lucky Charms or Dunkaroos or Gushers goo snacks? No Pizza Pockets or Swanson's TV dinners or Fruit by the Foot? What a boring grocery store trip! Not even any impulse buys at the checkout line, like magazines about... herself? This does not sound like any grocery shopping trip we've ever been on, that's for sure. [Us Weekly]
Kim Kardashian, sister of Rob, broker her self-imposed, post-divorce media blackout to pose for the March issue of Allure, because she is nothing if not honor bound to her important duties. She probably did not want to do it, but she had sworn a great and serious oath to be on the cover of the March issue of Allure, and she would not break that vow lest the gods cast her away forever. When reached for comment, a spokesperson from Allure nodded their head solemnly and pointed a crooked, nearly cloak-covered finger up to the heavens and sad "The Kardashian one dwells with the eagles now," meaning she's of noble spirit. And she really is. Stay strong, Kim! [Page Six]
This article is from the archive of our partner The Wire.
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