When we mix banks and sports teams, it tends to be in
reference to sporting venues: Citi Field, Citizens Bank Park, Bank of
But what if banks really were sports teams?
The comparison is not as far-fetched as you may think. After all, we often choose our banks and our sports teams based on
where we grew up or where we live, and then pour money into the ones
Over at Business Insider, Katya Wachtel and Adam Fusfeld play matchmaker:
Morgan and the New Orleans Saints: JP Morgan "has a reputation for
being one of the best behaved, most compliant banks" and, relative to other bank CEOs, people like Jamie Dimon. Similarly, the Saints are a "scandal-less team
that is the darling of football" after last year's post-Katrina Super
Bowl win. Quarterback Drew Brees is the "mancrush of every sportswriter
- Bank of America and the Dallas Cowboys: Bank of
America, the biggest bank in the U.S. by assets, is constantly beset by
scandals; the Cowboys, owned by the controversy-prone Jerry Jones,
are the most valuable franchise in the country according to Forbes.
who can ignore the connection between America's bank and "America's
- Credit Suisse and the Tampa Bay Rays: Credit "was
praised for being one of the few major international banks to weather
the financial crisis without any direct government support," just as
the Rays have managed to compete and even make the World Series while
spending considerably less than their deep-pocketed rivals, the Yankees
and the Red Sox. Oh, and both organizations recently launched re-branding
- Goldman Sachs and the New York Yankees: Goldman
is "the most successful securities firm in history" and "the envy of
all other banks," while the Yankees claim the most championships in
American professional sports. Both New York-based organizations are
"constantly under a media and public scrutiny to the point of
obsession." What's more, you'll often find employees of both wearing
You can find all the happy couples--along with disturbing photos that superimpose the heads of bank chiefs on the bodies of athletes--here.
This article is from the archive of our partner The Wire.