Into The Void
Marty Beckerman reviews an innovative new undergarment:
The sacfree press release promised:
"The world-wide first testicle-free men's underwear -- a fantastic, comfortable, free feeling and a new sexy look. ... And so it works: sacfree® protects and supports the penis in a bag-like pouch. Till here sacfree® feels like a classic slip. For the testicle sacfree® offers pure space. Through an opening the sac can hangs out completely free. ... With its open kind sacfree® makes for a fresh breeze. A comfortable and manly healthy characteristic... [A]bove all, people who works vocationally much in sitting will appreciate the new sacfree® freedom." ...
So back in our bedroom after dinner, I removed my shirt. "Oooooooh," she cooed. I unfastened my belt. "Mmmmmmm," she purred. I dropped my drawers.
"Your ... your balls ...?" she gawked at my crotchless boxers with a combination of bafflement and horror.
"Yes," I nodded confidently. "My balls."
She reached for the TV remote instead of my (semi-concealed, semi-showcased) male anatomy. "Put your pants back on," she instructed. "Those look ridiculous."