A reader writes:

I was so disappointed when Douthat went all Dreher. Just as Dreher did 2 years ago, when even his most devout readers couldn’t find a positive argument in his morass of unfounded worries, Ross has reached for the celibate lesbian, whose choice is really, at the end of the day, the ONLY choice they think we have.

It’s not about protecting hetero marriage; it is about retaining enough social stigma around homosexuality and gay sex that the church and its members can continue to feel comfortable gently loving us with pity. I have to say the “uppity women” analogy is perfect. If we skulked around, chuckling over our funny relationships, and publicly felt bad about ourselves, Ross would feel much more comfortable. Neither Ross nor Rod can come right out and say it: it’s not marriage that falls apart, it’s the moral authority of MY church. It pains me that the faithful continue to draw the battle lines this way: whatever gays get must be a loss for Christianity.

Keep it up. Keep asking the very simple question: “then what can we have?” Then, once Ross answers, I’d like him to explain it to my mother.

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