A reader writes:
Ahem. Some of us prefer the term Fairy Princess.
I find the term Fag Hag horribly degrading to the wonderful straight women in my life. I much prefer Flame Dame or Fruit Fly. Oh, and Lesbros is the straight guy/lesbian equivalent.
Fruit fly? Another:
When I was in college the term for a man who predominantly befriended lesbians was "Dutch Boy," though in my experience it was more a derogatory term for such men used between lesbians.
I can relate to your remark that some girls just want to have fun. I was a single 26-year-old woman in 1974 when the disco scene was hot. I loved to dance but dreaded putting myself out as bait for a relationship I didn't want. The best places to dance without complication were disco clubs near me in Hollywood.
They were filled with gay men dancing their hearts out. I loved going there and many guy were happy to dance with me, since I wore great twirly dresses. The bathroom situation was remarkable in that "boys" and "girls" held no meaning, and I had to fight my way through men to go pee, but nobody bothered looking at me while I did so. (No doors on the stalls!) Great memories...
Gay guys like the things we like. My gay friend went shopping with me and my 4-year-old daughter last week, and loved it told me to give him a call the next time I go. My husband would rather have his fingernails pulled out with hot tongs, you know? So it’s fun to have a male friend who "gets" many traditionally female pastt imes (though I couldn’t talk my friend into going to see Sex and the City 2 with me!).
True: hanging out with gay men does provide the chance have fun without the possibility of sexual tension (although we can get that from girlfriends too). It's not just that, though - gay guys are still guys, and we can learn things about the way guys look at the world from our gay friends that we can't learn from women.
I just thought I'd share this Onion article from 2002 on the subject.
(Photo: Actress Kathy Griffin arrives with some Siberian Huskies at the Best In Drag Show 2005 held at the Wilshire Ebell Theater on October 16, 2005 in Los Angeles, California. By Vince Bucci/Getty Images.)