Chris Orr non-reviews G.I. Joe: The Rise Of Cobra:
Sometimes, a film defies conventional narrative and artistic standards so utterly that it seems unfair to judge it by them. G.I. Joe is such a case, a movie that has, through its own inverse accomplishment, earned the right to speak for itself. Consider this a tone poem in 40 scraps of dialogue.
Rotten Tomatoes gives it 38%. Like I needed to check.