Weddingflowers

Megan has an announcement to make:

It's outre, I know, but I sort of believe in marriage.  I believe in the act of committing for life to another person.  I believe in the power and the joy of facing your life as a team.  I think you can have a very happy, fulfilled life without being married, and before I met Peter, I was preparing to.  But my life is even happier and more fulfilled with him.  So naturally, I want to start building that life as Team McSudelman.

There's a reason for the social role of "spouse".  And there's a reason for all of the legal and social systems that have grown up around that role:  they reinforce and strengthen it.  It would be much harder to do many of the things we want and intend to do, for and with each other, without that useless little piece of paper.

Since Aaron and I got married, we've both grown more domestic, happier, calmer. His rock-solid emotional support has allowed me to venture further and further into the kind of intellectual and political terrain that requires the nerve and self-criticism it's hard to sustain emotionally alone. And since we've been together, he has been able to start an acting career he couldn't have managed financially alone - and his work is extraordinary. (If you are in Ptown this summer, check him out in "Take Me Out" at the Provincetown Theater - Wednesdays and Thursdays through August 20). To watch someone you love blossom and grow and mature and thrive is what my Jewish friends call a mitzvah.I love Aaron unconditionally; but every day I somehow love him more.

Of course, our marriage is invalid as far as the US government is concerned. And Megan's description of her choice to marry or not is denied many. For Megan, not getting married can seem a silly riposte to the religious right. For many gays, getting married offends the religious right. But marriage should be embraced for no political reasons (and mine certainly wasn't). It should be embraced because you love another human being and want to be with them and support them and hold them for the rest of your life.

And that is a good thing for all of us. Mazel tov, Megan and Peter. May the McSudermans love long and prosper.

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