[Patrick Appel] The Onion has a very helpful glossary of commonly used political terms. Some of my favorites:
An object recording a voter's decision that is frequently counted toward an election's outcome
A contest to see which candidate can answer the fewest questions.
A process by which the number of states in the Union is narrowed down to the most important seven or eight.
A quantitative score any politician may increase by slaying foes or solving riddles.
An intangible object within every American that is destroyed every four years in November.
A list of the subjects that candidates are willing to discuss.
Rock The Vote-
Something that is, apparently, still happening.
The glossary reminds of me of The Devil's Dictionary by Abrose Bierce which was first published in the 1880s. A few examples of definitons from the book:
Alliance, n. In international politics, the union of two thieves who have their hands so deeply in each other's pockets that they cannot seperately plunder a third.
Alone, adj. In bad company.
Future n. That period of time in which our affairs prosper, our friends are true and our happiness is assured.
You get the idea.
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