This Jesse Walker farewell is priceless:

Tom Tancredo has dropped out of the presidential race. He will be replaced by Montezuma Aztlán Calderón, an undocumented worker from Oaxaca who will denounce the Brown Peril for just $3 an hour plus room and board.

Did he kill off Thompson's campaign? We'll all miss one-liners like this:

"I took accordion lessons. It was horrible. I never practiced. I hated it. It's child abuse."

But not torture.