McSweeney's Extra-Pithy Guide To The Candidates continues. My two favorites:
Pro: Knows how to get to the White House, where to park, location of restrooms.
Con: Wants to accomplish something meaningful.
Not to slight:
Pro: Thoughtful; self-effacing; like many Americans, enjoys cable television.
Con: At present, no budget line item exists for moody introspective music to underscore every statement president makes in order to make it sound more poignant.