Sometimes, Canada is beyond parody, because a story like this one comes along that includes so many clichés that you expect it's either a Jimmy Kimmel prank or an Onion headline mistakenly reported as facts. But this one is all true.
A man in Ontario found a baby moose on the side of a highway Monday, just outside the town of Sudbury, but before he could take the moose in for proper care, he took it to the local Tim Hortons for a quick coffee.
"She still had the umbilical cord and was still wet when I found her," Stephan Michel Desgroseillers, the hero of the story, can be heard telling a small crowd in a video posted by a local radio station, Q92 Rocks. The moose was very clearly a newborn whose mother had disappeared. The CBC reports the mother moose was hit by a truck in a nearby residential neighborhood.
Desgroseillers told CTV News he tried to direct the baby calf back into the wilderness, but "the little calf kept wandering back onto the road and into traffic," he said. After some confusion while trying to contact animal rescue centers, the police told Desgroseillers he had to take the baby moose home. "The OPP [Ontario Provincial Police] basically told me, 'You know what, Steph? You have a pet until someone can take her in,'" Desgroseillers said.
So Desgroseillers took his new pal home overnight. The next day, he contacted the Wild at Heart Animal Shelter, who agreed to take the baby moose in for proper care. But before dropping the baby moose off to the professionals, Desgroseillers shared his miracle moose with his fellow Canucks at the local Tim Hortons. "The wolves would have gotten her," our hero says to the small crowd petting the adorable infant moose in the Tim Hortons parking lot.
Reports that the moose politely ordered a side of poutine before joining a traveling hockey team are still unconfirmed at this time.
This article is from the archive of our partner The Wire.
We want to hear what you think about this article. Submit a letter to the editor or write to firstname.lastname@example.org.