Your Laughs May Prevent Qatar's Beautiful World Cup Vagina Stadium from Being Built

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The country of Qatar is faced with a difficult choice: succumb to the laughs and scrap the plans for their precious soccer stadium or soldier on and feign ignorance while important World Cup matches are being played in an enormous, illuminated vagina. The stadium in question is the al-Wakrah stadium, one of the structures being built for the 2022 World Cup — the concept, according to architects, was to look like the sails of a dhow boat, which were used in Qatar for pearl fishing. Boats like this:

Dhow boats ... right. News agencies like The Guardian and sites like Jezebel were quick to point out that they did not see the sails of a majestic dhow seagoing craft, but rather female genitalia. “The Qatari stadium’s resemblance to a woman’s private parts may be unintentional, but I for one applaud it," The Guardian's Holly Baxter wrote. “I was surprised that the piece went viral so quickly — but then again, buildings that look like vaginas are few and far between," she added. 

So Qatar's World Cup stadium designers accidentally envisioned a majestic vagina with the capacity for 40,000 screaming fans. This might be history's largest subliminal vagina. And the Internet laughed. And laughed. And is still laughing. 

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The laughs haven't gone unheard by the colossal vagina designers at Aecom. Curiously, they told Al Arabiya that they are aware of the news but aren't issuing a response until a month or two goes by. They said:

“Our communications team has not allowed any information to be given at this stage,” a spokesperson at the firm said.

“A statement in response to the news may be released in a month or two.”

Why would someone take a month to respond to breaking news? That delay is curious. And when you think about it, a month or two might be enough time to figure out a new design and presentation — the al-Wakrah stadium is only in the latter design stages. Baxter believes that might be the case. She told Al Arabiya:

But I do think that the publicity the stadium has now had will probably prevent it being built, which is a tragedy for all of us with female genitalia who were so looking forward to seeing our vulvas reproduced on the Qatari skyline.

A month or two may also be enough time to let the jokes die down. 

The vagina stadium hanging in a balance is just another headache for Qatar and its World Cup hosting duties. FIFA President Sean Blatter has already hinted that letting the country host the World Cup may have been a "mistake." But at the time that was for things like the temperature and Qatar's political place in the world. We also found out the country may be using slave labor to build things for the World Cup — all  bigger problems than whether or not their stadium looks like human genitals. 

This article is from the archive of our partner The Wire.