Yesterday, after promising to speak until he could no longer stand, Ted Cruz finished over 21 hours of filibustering, making pop culture references and comparing Obamacare and Nazi Germany. "Well it's easy for you to take that kind of physical risk, you've got government healthcare," Jon Stewart said on last night's Daily Show.
Stewart's main complaint, however, was with Cruz's less than stellar arguments against the Affordable Healthcare Act. "C'mon Senator Ted Cruz, this isn't even a filibuster," Stewart said. "You had 20 hours to make your case. You're double ivy league. Surely you can do better, maybe cite a study or a book." And in a way he did do better. Cruz read Green Eggs and Ham, as a bedtime story to his two girls. Apparently Cruz forgot what the moral of that particular story is.
"So to express your opposition to Obamacare, you go with a book about a stubborn jerk who decides he hates something before he's tried it. And when he finally gets a taste, he has to admit, after tasting it, 'this is pretty f***ing good.'" Stewart said. "You know what Ted Cruz? The level of threat you say we face from Obamacare isn't met by the quality of solutions and the rhetoric that you offer. You know, it reminds me of a character I once read about, by I believe one of your favorite authors, Dr. Seuss, in his beloved children's book The Bore-ax."
Stewart read his favorite passage from the story:
Lived the showboatiest blab whose name was Ted Cruz
Ted talked about healthcare, compared it to Nazis
As comparisons go, he was off by a lotsie
Healthcare, he said, would end this great nation
A point made after hours of mouth masturbation
Repeal it! Defund it! Erase it! Deny it!
Murder it! Skull f*** it! Bread and deep fry it!
Cruz claimed freedom and liberty, but it was all a big show
Because he could have spent all that time making sure the law didn't blow"