ABC Meddles with History

Today in show business news: ABC is developing an alternate history series, Woody Allen wins a lifetime achievement award, and Julianne Moore joins the Hunger Games crew.

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Today in show business news: ABC is developing an alternate history series, Woody Allen wins a lifetime achievement award, and Julianne Moore joins the Hunger Games crew.

ABC, struggling to keep itself out of last place, has put a ballsy new show in development. The network announced today that it is working on a series called The Thirteen, which imagines that the Americans didn't win the Revolutionary War. So it's present day and Americans are still fighting the British. The number in the title refers to the colonies, duh. That's pretty much all we know about it. So, like, if it's still the thirteen colonies, does California exist? And if we're still ruled by the British, does that mean that we're related to Prince Harry? How does this all work? It sounds intriguing, but there are a lot of questions. Is Hugh Grant still a movie star? I mean, does so-called British charm even mean anything if we all hate the British? What are everyone's accents like? Hurry up and make this show, ABC. Because these are some burning questions. [Deadline]

What was once rumored is now confirmed. Julianne Moore will be playing Alma Coin in the last two Hunger Games movies. Coin is a pretty important role in that leg of the tale, so it makes sense to get someone big like Moore. And for Moore, she gets to make a movie that her kids will see and she can finally put that helipad on the roof of her townhouse! It's win-win! [Entertainment Weekly]

Woody Allen has been named the winner of the Golden Globes' Cecil B. DeMille Award, which he will receive at the big ceremony in January. The award is meant for lifetime achievement, but Woody shouldn't take it as a sign that he's finished or anything. I mean, Blue Jasmine was the best thing he's done in almost ten years and, hey, last year Jodie Foster won, and she's like twenty years younger than him. So it's just an award, it doesn't mean anyone's career is over. It will be interesting to see what Allen's speech is like, considering Foster's speech involved her taking her own head off, dribbling it like a basketball, then reciting the entirety of Siddhartha backwards. It was a weird speech, is what I'm saying. Let's see if Woody can top it. [The Hollywood Reporter]

Ugh. The Weinsteins have bought to rights to Paddington Bear, the little marmalade-loving immigrant bear from children's books. And they're making a freaking movie about him. What's more, it's a live-action/animation hybrid movie. Yup. Colin Firth is voicing the bear and Nicole Kidman will play "an evil taxidermist out for revenge." The cast also includes Julie Walters, Jim Broadbent, Sally Hawkins, and Hugh Bonneville. So, OK, there is some hope for this. The British tend to do children's movies a little more gently than we do over here. If this was an American production it would assuredly be a nightmare, but the British guy who beautifully produced all the Harry Potter movies is producing this, so maybe it will be OK. If the Weinsteins let it be, anyway. [Deadline]

This, on the other hand, will definitely be terrible. Jack Black is in talks to star in a movie based on R.L. Stine's Goosebumps books, a kiddie series of scary stories that were never as interesting as Stine's Fear Street series. Black will play an author whose scary characters come to life. For this film, Black will be reteaming with his Gulliver's Travels director Rob Letterman. Right. Because that was such a good experience. I know that movie was eventually a hit overseas but it was a bomb here and everyone hated it. "Let's do that again!" - Jack Black, evidently. Oh well. It's his life. [The Wrap]

Here is a trailer for a documentary called Broadway Idiot, about Green Day frontman Billie Joe Armstrong's experience turning the band's album American Idiot into a Broadway musical. It looks interesting. Who doesn't love a backstage documentary? Will watch, yes sir.

Image via J.T. Lewis/Shutterstock

This article is from the archive of our partner The Wire.