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Canada, our lovable, frosty neighbors to the north, rejected Randy Quaid's bid for refugee status, leaving the renegade actor and his wife out in the not so proverbial cold as they await appeals and the rest of us await the couple's next star-whacker conspiracy. 

The Canadian Press and Associated Press confirmed with government officials that Quaid's bid for refugee status was denied, and Quaid's wife, Evi, told the CP it was because Quaid doesn't have a passport, which Quaid contends was taken by Canadian officials.

So where does Randy Quaid go from here? He has a few options, surprisingly. Quaid's wife said the couple plans on heading to the U.S. consulate in Toronto on February 6 to retrieve his passport, in an effort to stay up north. Should that effort fail, Quaid and his wife can appeal the judge's decision in a federal court. Should that effort fail, Eli is fine (she's a Canadian citizen), but Randy Quaid might be forced to flee to another country. Is Europe next? Maybe Australia? They make movies in Australia! If the couple return to the U.S., California authorities have said they will be arrested and have to face charges there. The Quaids told a Canadian judge in October they were planning to square up what they owe to American authorities, so we don't really see what the problem is there. 

Randy Quaid was arrested in Vancouver in October for outstanding vandalism charges in the U.S. for allegedly causing $5,000 worth of damage to a home the couple rented in California. At a court hearing in October, Quaid and his wife pleaded with the judge to let them stay in Canada because they "were worried about friends 'murdered' in Hollywood such as actors Keith Carradine," who they had confused with with brother, David Carradine. Keith is very much alive. Quaid and his wife famously claimed they were running from "Hollywood star-whackers" in that insane Vanity Fair profile. 

If the passport issue seems a little off, the Internet has some good theories as to why Quaid and his wife were ultimately rejected: 

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