Today in celebrity gossip: Kim Kardashian wants to know more about the Gaza conflict, Justin Bieber has a sleepover with Selena Gomez, and Mila & Ashton enjoy Rome.
Aw. It thinks it's people. The sentient pile of gristle and concealer known as Kim Kardashian has decided, after putting her foot in it on Twitter regarding this whole Gaza mess, to travel to the Middle East and, hopefully, learn about just what the hell is going on while over there. And what better place to learn about the decades-old conflict between Israel and the million and half people it's put in a ghetto than Kuwait and Bahrain? That's where you go to learn about Palestine. To Kuwait and Bahrain. Well, see, OK, she's technically not traveling to do some sort of Mid-East education tour. She's going to Kuwait and Bahrain to attend the opening of two Millions of Milkshakes stores. Hahaha. Yes. That is why Kim Kardashian, kiln-cooked mound of collagen, is traveling to this ancient and complex region. For the Millions of Milkshakes. But because of her Twitter oopsy, she now wants to make it about Israel and Palestine, even though she'll be hundreds of miles away. You have to respect her initiative, though. And it will probably be a powerful moment when someone tells her that there are no Millions of Milkshakes for the refugees in Gaza to enjoy. In fact, there are quite possibly no milkshakes at all. "What do they drink while watching my show?" she'll then ask with a timid, plaintive squeak. And then some even harder news will have to be broken to her. [TMZ]
Oh oh ohhh. After the little-watched American Music Awards on Sunday, Justin Bieber didn't go home with his old lady aggressor, as that awful woman clearly hoped he would, but instead he slinked off in his drop-crotches to go drop some crotch with Selena Gomez. Hahaha ew. We all continue to be a little gross as toast for caring about the love life of an 18-year-old child, but even mentioning Bieber and Gomez dropping crotches is grounds for being sent to gross jail. That is deeply gross and I apologize. Anyway, Biebs did stay the night at Gomez's place after hitting an after party with her. He was seen leaving her house the next morning in his same outfit — drop-crotch pants, chain, weird shiny red pope loafers — and walking with visible bow-leggedness. Does this mean they're back together? Or are they just casually dropping crotches? It's hard, nay impossible, to say. The only way to know would be to steal their cellphones and read their text messages, which would be ridiculous because that one security guy of Justin's knows our face now and we don't want to end up back in prison after what happened with Chad Allen all those years ago. No sir. We're not repeating that mistake. Those kids can drop crotches in peace and quiet if they want to. No one's stealing anything. [Daily Mail]