Don't Worry, Those 'Jersey Shore' Kids Aren't Going Anywhere

This article is from the archive of our partner .

Though this season of MTV's successful collaboration with Troma Entertainment, Jersey Shore, is its last, we need not say goodbye to all those greased-up opossums just yet. MTV has just announced that the show's frequent voice of reason Vinny "Vinny" Guadagnino is getting his own talk show. The series, Evening Edition with Vinny Guadagnino, will cover news of the day, allow time for Vinny's trademark editorializing, and will feature interviews with important newsmakers and thinkers. And it will all be done in Vinny's Staten Island home! Yup, the show, which is actually just called The Show with Vinny, will be filmed in his house and will include his wacky Staten Island family. A "celebrity" guest will come over and help cook a meal and then sit down for a convo. It's actually kind of a cute idea if the person hosting it wasn't just dumb old Vinny from Jersey Shore. I mean, a celebrity guest is going to travel allll the way out to Staten Island (provided they actually do use his house) just to talk to Vinny? Seems dubious. Anyway, at least he'll still be around. As will JWoww and Snooki. And The Pauly D Project. So really the only one out of work soon is going to be The Situation. (And Ronnie and Sammi, but no one ever cared about them.) Who would have guessed that? [Entertainment Weekly]

Ha. Oh my. Morgan Spurlock, he of Super Size Me and that dumb Osama bin Laden movie, will next be directing the One Direction concert movie. Yup. It's going to be 3D just like Justin's and the Jonas Brothers' before that and there will be very tame backstage shenanigans and probably some light over-the-underwear stuff and that will be the movie. And Morgan Spurlock is directing it, for some strange reason. "Strange reason" might mean "dumptruck full of money." Morgan Spurlock is directing it for some dumptruck full of money. That could possibly be what it means. Also, a "Richard Griffiths" is listed as a producer, which, uh, if they mean the actor, let's hope his History Boys character is in no way true to life. Or that he at least stays in some producers office far away from the tightpants. [Deadline]

Speaking of big gay musical extravaganzas, Liza Minnelli has been confirmed as a guest star for the upcoming second season of NBC's dirge-like celebration of Broadway, Smash. She'll be playing herself and will sing an original song. Not written by her, haha oh god can you imagine, written by the show's music writers, Marc Shaiman and Scott Wittman. Sigh. Don't you wish she'd written it though? "Here we go boys. And a-one and a-two and a-shoo shoo shoo, here we go... Blackbirdsssss singin' in my brain / Oh Mr. Jujamcyn, won't you make it rain / I've been to Paris and I've been to Nice / I've even worn Jason's golden fleece / But if you see my cuckoo clockkkk / Well you better give it back to me doc." And this would all be sung while she was face down in a pillow. Just let her write the song, won't you please, Smash? "Never trust a fella with only one wristwatch / Six Nilla wafers and three fingers of scotch..." And so on. [The Hollywood Reporter]

Ooooh. This handsome Brit has just been cast as a love interest for Sookie on True Blood. He'll be playing a "a highly charismatic faerie" who— Wait, hold on a sec. "Highly charismatic faerie"? Haha, nope. Sorry, show. Not this time. That sounds very bad. We will not be watching this. You can't lure us in with some dumb hunk again. That Joey Magnets or whatever the werewolf's name is might have worked a few years ago, but we're wise to your ways now. No sir. No highly charismatic faeries for us, thanks. The only highly charismatic faerie we're interested in is Tyler Oakley. (Haha, JK, no we're not.) Fool us once, True Blood, shame on you. Fool as twice and still shame on True Blood because True Blood is an awful show and why do we keep watching it oh right hunks. [Deadline]

Greg Berlanti, who makes dope-based shows like Everwood, Jack and Bobby, No Ordinary Family, and Political Animals (dope meaning full of dopes, not drugs dope), is teaming up with Julie Plec, who created The Vampire Diaries and say what you will about that show there's still Steven R. McQueen and you can't take that away from it, to remake a British show called The Tomorrow People. It's basically a teen superhero/futuristic kind of a thing that first premiered on ITV back in the '70s but was then revived in the '90s and actually aired on Nickelodeon for a little while. Basically it's about young folks who can do telepathy and teleport and all manner of other supernatural sh-t because they're the next evolution of people. So, it'll be sexy youngs doing battle with sexy bads and sexily kissing each other but it'll all be kinda cheesy and self-important because it's Greg Berlanti and all kinda overly moody and darkly lit because it's Julie Plec and that will be that. And we will be watching every episode. [The Hollywood Reporter]

ABC has ordered a full season of Nashville. Now if someone could just order full arms for Hayden Panettiere we'd be in business. No, no, come on, that is not nice at all. She's great on that show and cute as a bug. So is Connie Britton. This is good news, actually! Sure the show has lost its way a little bit down that dark soapy path of listlessness, but we're confident it can come back. Plus the music is fun no matter what. And it keeps Jonathan Jackson off the streets. All things considered, it's good that it's on the air. [Vulture]

Just when you thought that the release of the final Twilight film would rid the cinema of the oeuvre of Stephenie Meyer comes a trailer for the adaptation of her novel The Host, a sci-fi thriller thing about a scared but special girl and the hot-chinned boy who wants to protect her. So, goodie, right? Just what everyone wanted. More of that. Oh, Saoirse. Oh, Max Irons. Why, children? Why?

This article is from the archive of our partner The Wire.