Mitt Romney, FINISH HIM!

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We realize there's only so much time one can spend in a day watching new trailers, viral video clips, and shaky cell phone footage of people arguing on live television. This is why every day The Atlantic Wire highlights the videos that truly earn your five minutes (or less) of attention. Today:

Oh Slate. Thank you for making your video team work really hard and give us the Presidential Race reimagined as Mortal Kombat. We are sincerely hoping that Marcus Bachmann makes an appearance as, hm, maybe a really big fan of Johnny Cage?

Tick tock, tick tock, another Taken movie is here. Clearly, we are in the season of Neeson, and the aptly-titled Neeson: The Musical is the scarily accurate soundtrack. 

This lady scares bears (and has a backyard that looks like Rivendell).

Lastly, it seems like it was just yesterday that we were swooning and chortling over Shaun Sperling's 1992 rendition of Vogue at his bar mitzvah. Well, Sperling is, for better or worse, a man now because time is funny like that and is now doing a more adult version of Vogue for charity. Charity outweighs milking your 15 minutes of fame right?  (We kind of hope the other Vogue kid hasn't resorted to this.)

This article is from the archive of our partner The Wire.