Hey, That Dog Has a Blog

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The Call Sheet sifts through the day's glut of Hollywood news to find the stories even non-industry types care about. Today: Disney gives a blog to a dog, Nancy Meyers and Tina Fey are looking for an old man, and Pauly D is very very rich.

The Disney Channel, the nation's repository for our most important television shows, has announced that they've picked up a new series called Dog With a Blog. The show is about a cat with a Twitter account. No, dumbos, it's about a dog what done have itself a blog! There's also of course a human family involved, a recently married couple and two frequently fighting step siblings, one of whom will be played by this young lady. The mom is going to be played, sadly, by Beth Littleford, who was on The Daily Show like a million years ago and is now on Dog With a Blog. You deserve better, Beth! Anyway, so yeah, the dog is brought into the family as a way to pacify the step-siblings but then they find out that the dog can talk and write and stuff so they freak out and set it ablaze shrieking "Burn, demon! Burn!" which really brings them closer together. That or they find out that the dog wrote something really racist on Taki's Mag and everyone feels really uncomfortable for a while. [The Hollywood Reporter]

Paramount will be producing a new comedy from lifestyle porn expert Nancy Meyers called The Intern. In the film, Tina Fey will play the owner of some sort of e-commerce business that sells mostly fashion and who gets a new intern who's "a senior," only to find out that that doesn't mean high school or college, it means like senior citizen. Like an old man. So...um, well, that happens and Fey is upset but then of course the old man proves invaluable and they form a close bond. Not a romantic bond, mind you. None of that happening here. Just a friend bond. (And they didn't even need a blogging dog to do it!) Apparently Meyers has an old dude in mind for the senior role but hasn't said who, so let's guess. Ian McKellen? Morgan Freeman? George Clooney? Haha, jk jk, McKellen's not that old. Maybe Jack Nicholson? He worked with Nancy Meyers in Something's Gotta Give, after all. Whoever it is, it's kind of hard to get excited about someone getting cast in some old man comedy about friendship. Though of course this could end up being good, Nancy Meyers movies are all strangely enjoyable (yes, even The Holiday), if for no other reason than people's houses are always really nice. Bring on the nice houses! Or, like, nice nursing homes. [Deadline]

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Hunger Games broodpot Liam Hemsworth has signed on to star in the film Paranoia, a corporate espionage thriller to be directed by Robert Luketic, the genius behind Killers, The Ugly Truth, Monster-in-Law, and Win a Date With Tad Hamilton!. (And, to be fair, Legally Blonde.) Possibly joining Hemsworth in the film will be Harrison Ford and Gary Oldman, who will play, respectively, a ditzy coed who winds up at Hemsworth's highly selective law school and the bitchy, controlling mother of Hemsworth's fiance. Should be interesting! [The Hollywood Reporter]

Pauly D from Jersey Shore is being sued by his former agents at ICM and the lawsuit reveals hideous facts about the exorbitant amounts of money that Pauly D has made for being Pauly D. There are figures like: "Pauly D’s pay went up in season five of Jersey Shore, with MTV giving him a $400,000 signing bonus and $150,000 an episode." ......... What's even the point, you know? What's even the point of trying to do anything if that's going on one state away? Pauly D is a multi-millionaire by now (if he hasn't spent it all already, which is certainly possible) and everyone else is just struggling along like idiots. Only, like, regular-type idiots. Not idiots who make $2,000,000 a year for being idiots. Sigh. We're moving to South Georgia Island. We'll just work at the museum. [Deadline]

Warner Bros. has bought an adapted screenplay called Lore and plans to make it a vehicle for The "Dwayne Johnson" Rock. The story is described as "Men in Black with mythological creatures," which basically means it's Percy Jackson with a few swears, I guess. Sounds perfect for The Rock, as he tends to alternate between grownup stuff (Journey 2 the Mysterious Island) and kiddie fare (Fast Five). Oh, wait, no, I know what this basically is. It's Grimm, right? Except with myths instead of fairy tales, which really are the same thing, except not religious I guess? It's Grimm and the Olympians: You Know the Difference Between You and Me? I Make This Look Good. Sounds great. [The Hollywood Reporter]

The Office reached a series low in ratings last night, this coming amid reports that show creator Greg Daniels is considering scrapping all the Dunder Mifflin stuff and starting over with a new office and a new cast next season. Sounds like a lot of work for something that probably won't ultimately pan out very well, but what do we know. They need to figure something out, because it's sinking in the ratings and no one really cares about it anymore except to say that it stinks, y'know? So, figure something out, guys. (Meaning: Just end the damn show. Seriously, put it to bed before all we remember is when it stunk and no one watched it.) [Entertainment Weekly]

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