Movies Are Just Going to Get More Expensive

Higher prices will save the industry, Demi Moore is a feminist icon, and Salma Hayek is a knight.

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The Call Sheet sifts through the day's glut of Hollywood news to find the stories even non-industry types care about. Today: Higher prices will save the industry, Demi Moore is a feminist icon, and Salma Hayek is a knight.

Well the good news for Hollywood is that, after a pretty bad 2011, some analysts are predicting that 2012's box office will see an uptick. Oh, but, ha, it's not because they're expecting the year's movies to be awesome or anything, it's because ticket prices are going to go up. So thus they'll make more money, some people, two people in particular, think. Isn't that great? It's not that the product or the experience of enjoying the product is going to get any better, it's that the product is going to get more expensive. Good thinking, everyone. If there's one thing that Americans have been saying as theater attendance lags over the past ten years it's that tickets just aren't expensive enough. Why are we, here in New York at least, shelling out a measly $13 for a ticket when we could be paying $20? Or $30? Hell, here's two weeks' pay, now give us a damn ticket to Underworld: 2 Under 2 World. (Underworld 4: The Legend of Scott Speedman's Career?) We know it's an old gripe to complain about how everything's too damn expensive these days, but man everything is too damn expensive these days. Some movies are worth it — they require big budgets so obvs it'll take more to recoup — but why are we paying the same thing for Harry Potter that we are for Beastly? (Which, OK, that we paid human money to see Beastly at all is entirely our fault, we know, but just goes with us here.) Let's have a sliding scale here, maybe? $15 for the big things, and maybe $7 for Monte Carlo. (Again, please just go with us.) And maybe don't rely on ticket price hikes to reverse a downtrend. Or, you know, don't listen to us as always. Sigh. [THR]

Speaking of all the amazing movies that Hollywood makes, two more actors have been cast in the upcoming Linda Lovelace biopic starring Amanda Seyfried. Adam Brody of all people will play a mustachioed porn star (one of Peter Gallagher's eyebrows will play the role of the mustache) and Demi Moore of all people will play Gloria Steinem, of all people. Adam Brody as a porn star we can deal with (maybe we can more than deal with it? But those are private thoughts for private times), but Demi Moore as Gloria Steinem?? We guess they kinda look the same, but Moore, star of Striptease and Charlie's Angels 2: Full Throttle, just doesn't exactly scream important feminist leader to us. Eh, but who really cares. It's a small-ish biopic of Linda Lovelace, not a Ken Burns documentary. We're just gonna go back to thinking about Seth Cohen as a porn star. Brings a whole new meaning to the word "schmear." (Ew.) [EW]

Another woman of a certain age, Cybill Shepherd, has just been announced as the costar of the upcoming Lifetime: Television for Afternoon Headaches series The Client List. That's the one with Jennifer Love Hewitt as the proprietor of a rub-'n'-tug that's based on the TV movie of the same name, in which Shepherd also co-starred. She played the other J.Lo's mother Cassie in the movie, but in the series she'll play her mother Lynette. Two very different characters, probably! Or just a cheap ploy to lightly capitalize on a name from Desperate Housewives. (Is "Cassie" too young sounding? Too sassy? Sassy Cassie vs. Nothing Rhymes With Lynette?) Who knows. The point is, Cybill Shepherd's doing another show and Christine Baranski's on a show too, which basically means we need to get Alicia Witt some work and we'll be in good shape. (Dedee Pfeiffer's a lost cause, we're afraid.) [Deadline]

Phew! The producers of 30 Rock have gone back and looked at all the scripts that deal with Kim Jong-Il this season (Jack's wife got kidnapped by North Korea in last year's finale) and apparently they never mention him specifically, and anyway she's supposed to marry his son, who's still alive, so they think they'll be fine. What a relief. There will be no terrible inaccuracy on that otherwise completely realistic and never absurd television series. (Really, was anyone worried about this? Who cares! We just want to see more of Margaret Cho as Johnny Mountain.) [Us Weekly]

Salma Hayek is to be knighted in France, for all her noble work as wife of a French billionaire the star of Fools Rush In. Yes, it really pays to be married to the CEO of one of France's biggest companies the love interest in Wild Wild West. [THR]

The NBC pilot Isabel, adapted from a French Canadian show about a dysfunctional family and its one magical daughter, has found their lead in the young actress Sophia Schloss, who recently was seen in the pilot of Grimm. Man, with a name like Sophia Schloss, wouldn't you change it to something cool like Sophie Castles? It's basically the same name, just shortened and translated and whatnot. If someone said "Hey want to meet my friend Sophia Schloss?" you'd be all "Hm, maybe." But if that same someone said "Wanna meet my pal Sophie Castles?" you'd be all "WHOA thought you'd never ask!" Just some advice, kid, before you get too big and can't do anything about your name. Get with the hip, zippy handle. If you really want to be daring go for So-So Château, but that's really only for the bravest of people. [Deadline]

Don't worry, Simon Cowell will be a judge for the whole season of Britain's Got Talent this year, a relief after last season when he was only around for the live episodes. Cowell released a statement saying, amongst other things, "it’s the year of the Olympics, it’s a big year for Britain, we are going to be in the world’s spotlight and I want this show to be back in the world spotlight." Yes, that's just what Britain needs to get back in the spotlight. Lonely weirdos warbling sad tunes on stage while a guy with a bizarre wedge-flattop hairdo says mean things to them. For England! [EW]

[Image via Allen W Yoo/Shutterstock]

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