'Brooklyn New Yorkers' Is a Terrible, Terrible NBA Team Name

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Mikhail Prokhorov only became owner of the New Jersey Nets back in May, but he's already emerged as one of the NBA's most gifted self-promoters. Seeing as how Prokhorov is a 6'9" Russian and the 39th richest man in the world, this was perhaps not unexpected. Fans did get a bit of a surprise, though, with the new nickname and logo Prokhorov unveiled in anticipation of the team's move to Brooklyn next year. The combination isn't cool or awkward or aggressively goofy, note bloggers, so much as--lame.

Behold, the Brooklyn New Yorkers (H/T Nets Daily)

Nets Daily, which broke the story, notes attorneys from the Philadelphia law firm Pepper Hamilton "sought trademark protection for the name, "Brooklyn New Yorkers", three logos featuring either a basketball or a basketball player and the Brooklyn Bridge and even a slogan, "We Come to Play." In each case, the trademark sought is for clothing including among other things: shirts, jerseys, jackets, athletic uniforms, headbands, hats, caps and footwear." Additionally, the domain name brooklynnewyorkers.com was recently registered through a proxy service.

Basketball fans struggled to contain their aesthetic outrage.

  • "With an open book of naming potential, the New Brooklyn Net-Blanks would surely choose something interesting and original, right? Right?!" - Rob Mahoney, Pro Basketball Talk
  • "Who's their mascot, Eustace Tilley? ... This is the Atlantic Yards project we're talking about, so maybe we should just be glad they're not going with The Brooklyn Blights. But hey, how about the Brooklyn Gentrifiers? Or, considering the borough's hottest trends, perhaps The Brooklyn Canners? The Brooklyn Bullets also has a zippy ring to it." - John Del Signore, Gothamist
  • "The 'Brooklyn' lettering in the proposed logo is pretty cool, it looks like the sort of tagging you see on a subway car, but the "Brooklyn New Yorkers?" I'm not feeling it." - Kelly Dwyer, Yahoo! Sports
  • "The 'New Yorkers'? Is this basketball team supposed to be meek and neurotic, perpetually complaining about rent-hikes?" - Andrew Sharp, SB Nation
  • "But Mikhail Prokhorov's team wouldn't really call themselves the Brooklyn New Yorkers, though, right? ...We're all for the Nets playing up their move into city limits, but calling a team the New Yorkers hardly seems like the most creative way to do that ... Then again, it does give Prokhorov the perfect opportunity to let David Remnick run the point once the team relocates." - Joe DeLessio, New York magazine
  • "Considering the copyright comes from a Philadelphia law firm, it is clearly lacking in the necessary New York wit. With that in mind...some suggestions:
  • The Brooklyn Bagels
  • The Brooklyn Deckers
  • The Bedford Stuyvesants
  • The Brooklyn Flannels
  • The Brooklyn Queens Expressways
  • The Park Slope Strollers
  • The Brooklyn Bee Keepers" - Matt Chaban, The New York Observer

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