I always start with the Bible. King James, of course. On the exercise machine. I'm not a religious man, but you never know when you're going to find a useful quote--something that sounds profound and isn't too well known. Next of course is the New York Times. I read it in my bath, with a cup of Earl Grey tea. After scanning the front page, I check to see if Roger Cohen has written anything. If he has, I don't read it and move on to the Washington Post and young George Will. My goodness, he has lost none of his riotous sense of humor. What was he writing about the other day? Manners? Malaysia? Oh well, awfully good stuff.
Of course I check to make sure that my own column is in its customary spot on the upper left corner of the op-ed page. That was Lippmann's spot, you know. Actually, they haven't run me up there for years, ever since that young twit took over, Sheridan? Hilton? Hiatt, that's it. Worm. Had the effrontery to tell me to stop writing about NATO. Should have taken his advice, actually. Every time I use the word NATO, the column slips further down the page. "Canada" the same. I'm told he's got a secret list: "irredentist," "transparency," "Iowa Caucuses."