Ann Coulter: What I Read

The conservative pundit is glued to MSNBC and The New York Times

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How do other people deal with the torrent of information that pours down on us all? What sources can't they live without? To find out, we regularly reach out to well-informed people to learn more about their media diets. This is taken from a conversation with author and political commentator Ann Coulter, whose new book, Demonic: How the Liberal Mob Is Endangering America, hit bookstores this week. 

When I first wake up, I don't open my eyes right away so I can read the backs of my eyelids, which say on the right one: "God is Republican" and the left: "Christie 2012." Second, I turn on MSNBC because there's nothing like a good belly laugh to start your day, then Fox News, to make sure Obama hasn't issued an executive order banning it yet. I only go to CNN if MSNBC, Fox, TV Land, WGN, TBS, USA, Bravo, HGTV and BBC America are in commercials. It doesn't happen very often, but when it does, boy, do I appreciate having CNN.

All my TVs are on MSNBC all day so that I can listen while I'm cooking, dusting, cleaning my guns, polishing my Reagan busts, marinating veal chops, autographing copies of my new book Demonic, correcting errors in Maureen Dowd's columns, etc., etc.

After scrolling through some my favorite Internet sites (Drudge Report, Human Events, Sweetness & Light, KausFiles, The Daily Caller, Garden & Gun), I usually read some of the NYT in hardcopy. I like to let the Times pile up during the week and read an entire stack of 'em over the weekend. I find it's much more pleasant to read the Treason Times a few days out of date because then I know that, no matter what they've written, they haven't destroyed the world yet.

In addition to my beloved Treason Times, I subscribe to Human Events and Newsmax. I also get hundreds of pictures of Rep. Anthony Weiner's penis every day. I don't even remember subscribing to it.

I'm on Twitter. It's the only way to follow me and not get your ass beat by my bodyguard. I tried to get on Facebook, but they said I couldn't have the name "Ann Coulter."  Facebook won't let me have my own name. They told me it's like when college basketball had to ban dunking because of Lew Alcindor. I'm that good. My homepage is really should be mandatory, don't you think, in this day and age? Where else can you get the important news of the day, witty comments, and unadulterated Ann Coulter?

My standard TV line up is: the "Brit Hume Show"--as we still call it--Hardball, O'Reilly, Rachel, Ed Schultz, O'Donnell, Hannity and, if I'm still up, Red Eye at 3 am (or midnight in LA!). I'm currently having Ed Schultz withdrawal. Weekends, I mostly watch Fox Business and C-SPAN and sometimes the Chris Wallace Show during one of their helpful evening replays.

Before I go to bed I usually watch one of various true crime shows like Forensic Files, Dominick Dunne's Power Privilege. and Justice, or Snapped. I pick up tips to avoid getting murdered, such as: don't be a stripper, don't marry a gambler, don't cheat on your spouse, don't marry a gay guy who wants to steal all your money and run off with a man, don't raise ungrateful layabouts and leave them a lot of money in your will, and never, EVER get in a car with a Kennedy behind the wheel. In fact, I think I'll be leaving everything in my will to National Right to Life.

As for what I read for "fun," everything I've just mentioned is purely for fun. Most fun: Chris Christie press conferences and anytime anyone asks Joe Biden anything.

This article is from the archive of our partner The Wire.