Make me a million

I'm working from home this morning, and the cable news channel is crammed with E*Trade ads along the lines of this one:

It just occurred to me how odd it is to see ads in the style of the late 1990's "Make a fortune in the stock market with [insert financial services firm here". The Dow is in the doldrums, and more to the point, you would think that people would be tired of get-rich-quick schemes based on rising asset prices. But perhaps they never do.